Dear teachers….

A wee reminder to cross your arms in front, as if about to move into garudasana, eagle pose, let go of all things yoga, and instead of moving into the asana, give yourself a big, big, bear hug.

I was at a party the other night (!), and someone promptly killed my vibe by asking me if I’m calm all the time, or ever feel angry or anxious - you know, those emotions that can make us feel like bad, wretched humans? I should probably add that the scene had my social awkwardness at an 8/10, making me extra prickly, but godammit it awoke my subconscious triggers. 

I can’t pinpoint exactly what it is that can frustrate me about the assumption that yoga teachers are zen all the time and have life sorted out. Ignorance? Unwanted pressure on my already over-achieving self? 

Whatever it is, this is a post to remind us that we might at times, feel like saying f#ck it and slide off the path of virtue, and that's ok. I’m not advocating an abandoning of faith, getting yourself arrested, or for you to drop your practice and succumb to the tiresome force of inertia full time. 

I’m merely opening up a space for us to be human. 

Someone who makes mistakes, and, in a desire to be loved, might do all kinds of irrational things. 

When fighting one of my hardest battles - shame - the only way I ever find victory is by understanding my fear and accepting my imperfect and worthy self. I might go for a walk and whisper sweet nothings to myself, or bring a hand to heart and self soothe. It works, sometimes. And other times, it doesn’t. 

But that’s the path of healing right? If we’re teaching students to be present and detangle from their habits of attachment, could we try to do the same in these hard but golden moments? Notice where we push ourselves away? Open our hearts to our own frailty, as we might do for others?

Accepting that we might stumble off the path gives us a chance to bring this work of yoga into everyday life. It’s letting compassion move through the cracks. Tara Brach reminded me of this recently: that we can only hold compassion for others, when we find self-compassion right here, right now, for ourselves first.

I’m sure we all have stories highlighting our humanness.

 Stories of margaritas and cleanses.

 Kind acts of service and bitter arguments.

Moments of pristine stillness and utter madness.

All can coexist. 

You’re doing great. Keep going, keep healing, keep growing. 

Share your wild and beautiful stories, with me or your sangha. This is the process that brings our teaching to life.

Love, 

Leanne xoxo